Traffic Jam When You’re Already Late

June 30, 2009

At least one of the following three basic scenarios always seem to happen when I drive on the freeway.  It’s two lanes in the picture, but obviously this applies to more lanes as well; the concepts are the same.  If you drive like this, then you’re an asshole.

Scenario 1:  the box-in maneuver

What happens:  you’re in one lane and about to switch over to the empty lane next to you, but the car in front of you changes first.  You think they do that to go faster than the car in front of them, but they go the SAME SPEED maintaining the SAME DISTANCE as if they were in the lane they switched out of.  WHY?!  Now you have been boxed in.

https://i2.wp.com/wilson.tu.googlepages.com/scenario1.png/scenario1-full;init:.png

Scenario 2:  the road-block

What happens:  two cars go the SAME SLOW SPEED  in the adjacent lanes thus not allowing cars to pass and causing major traffic.

https://i0.wp.com/wilson.tu.googlepages.com/scenario2.png/scenario2-full;init:.png

Scenario 3:  the cut-off

What happens:  you’re driving at a good speed and leave a good amount of space between you and the car in front.  Suddenly the asshole from the lane next to you cuts you off and then goes SLOWER than what you were going.

https://i0.wp.com/wilson.tu.googlepages.com/scenario3.png/scenario3-full;init:.png

Pro tip:  if you’re going slower than the traffic in that particular lane, don’t be an asshole and stay there.  Switch over a lane if the lane next to you is going the same speed you’re going.  And I can’t emphasize this enough:  stop being a nosy asshole and driving ass slow when you see an accident.  IT’S NONE OF YOUR CONCERN.  Unless you just witnessed a crazy accident and the people in that car need immediate help, don’t slow down to stare you busybody.

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2 Responses to “Traffic Jam When You’re Already Late”

  1. inflatablejesus Says:

    This is amazing.

  2. yvonne Says:

    how long did this post take you? haha.


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