Can’t Swim Across a River So Deep

October 14, 2011

Work is wearing me down.  Most recently, I feel like people think I’m the one who fucked up because some bitch on the apparel team took her sweet ass time getting me images that my copy writer insists on having to write our god damn copy.  Even then she wasn’t the one to actually send me those files.  She had to hire an assistant to do this for her.  Luckily for me her minion isn’t an asshole.  Additionally, the apparel team didn’t bother coming up with product names so I had to ask our copywriter to do that too.  Given that, these names weren’t approved by our legal department.

The great thing is that our actual company’s legal department doesn’t actually handle copy review anymore.  No, our parent company does that.  This is just fantastic for various reasons.  One:  they know very little about how our company actually functions (which as I discussed in a previous post, is something like smushing Legos together and expecting a model of the Empire State Building to come from it).  Two:  I’m in California and they’re in Ohio.  Because everyone I request stuff from likes to send things after their lunch and siesta, they’re practically out of the office by the time I forward it onto them.  Three:  our actual legal team in our company that used to be here didn’t leave our parent company’s legal team much to work with, so they’re pretty fucking lost on a lot of shit.  Moreover, they’re asking me about how some of the legal processes happened, which I know nothing of because I’ve only been at this company for less than a year.

With that said, of course we missed our deadlines on launching a lot of products online and now I’m running around with my hair on fire trying to get the fucking copy and product names approved by the nice folks in legal.  But then legal has a bitch load of names to approve in front of ours, so it took the bitch who first fucked me in the ass in the beginning of this shit storm having to contact the other bitch in legal to get her to prioritize our product names because apparently those two bitches are like BFFs or something.  Problem resolved?  I’m afraid not.  That ho in legal is now going to be out of the office the entirety of next week, so the rest of the product names will be on hold until she gets back.  I emailed her back politely asking if she was going to delegate her work out, and if she had a ballpark time frame in mind of when I’d be getting the approved goods.  This cocksucker emails me back in a snoody tone, using the phrase “As I said before.”  This cow seems to think she’s told me this shit before, and that I’m supposed to know that my names will get worked on when she’s out of the office?  I searched and reread through all of her emails she sent me regarding this topic, and no where does it say or even imply that someone will be taking over her work.  I hope she finds the time to eat those bags of dick she’s been putting off to the side for so long now that she’s probably going on vacation for a week; I think she’s going through withdrawals.

In more exciting news, I finally bought my airfare to Italy so it’s pretty much official.  Now all I have to do is make some reservations in some hostels and I’m all set.  There’s a highly rated hostel in Milan that looks incredibly promising, so I’m anxious to see if it lives up to all the hype in the ratings.  The only bummer is that it looks like I’ll have to take a train from the airport into Milan, but then the walk looks like a short one.  More research at a later date.  I have to let this mentally settle first.  What I am almost certain of though, is that I’ll probably be spending New Year’s Eve/New Year’s day in Rome.  Really unsure what that entails, but I’m looking forward to spending it outside the country for once!

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