That Hasn’t Happened for the Longest Time

October 10, 2013

I think I decided that I won’t be doing my annual Year End Trip this year. It was about 80% of me wanting to go, but then another 60% of me too lazy and indecisive to plan it, which leaves us at about a 20% chance I’m going to go. It’s alright, though. In a way, I want to spend NYE here at home. It would be great if I could do it in a new place and in a different time zone so I can have some semblance of a fresh start to a new year (because, in case I forget, it really did change the way my year started), but I suppose it won’t be the end of the world if it doesn’t happen as long as I’m doing something with friends.

The sudden cool shift in the weather reminds me a lot of walking around in Europe. I get into this really peaceful place whenever I’m walking around outside when the weather is cool and brisk, which is incredibly intensified when I’m high. I then, of course, get reminded that I’m not going anywhere far this year, and that makes me a little sad and a little apprehensive, actually. I don’t know if it’s because there’s a possibility that I won’t be doing anything, or if it’s because I’m not going to be doing what I had hoped I’d be doing for at least 3 consecutive years, or that it could be I’m finally drifting out of my angsty stage in life and finally feeling some sort of calm in my life that I don’t think I’ve really felt since high school. But complacency scares me. I hope, though, that this is just a break from my regular programming, and that I’ll resume my travels abroad next year. Perhaps then my friends can come, too.


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