Something Good

October 24, 2014

I keep thinking to myself that this week sucks, but in reality it’s been one particular project that has been making me want to punch something. Here’s the abridged version of what’s been going down:  I have been leading a project that has been planned out really poorly, and with such a short and aggressive timeline. Eventually, it got to a point where I didn’t know what else to do because I wasn’t getting enough information, and I didn’t have enough time to actually learn the material to do my job. So I raise these concerns to the new managing director, and she keeps responding like I’m over-complicating things and being difficult. I practically lose my cool and leave the meeting feeling incredibly hopeless because, at this point, I’m supposed to be finishing off the project. And in my mind, this project and the work I’ve done so far is useless. After that meeting, I walk into my boss’ office and tell her the situation, and how I’m really annoyed at the uninformed and moronic planning and scoping of this project, and how I’ve been backed into a corner and have no idea what to do. Luckily, my boss had my back and ended up talking to the managing director herself, telling her we need to do this project differently. One thing led to another, and now things are running a little more smoothly.

Despite all the shit I’ve talked about her in the past, I’ve come to realize that it’s all still kind of true. However, at least now I realize why. She has been consistently placed in shitty situations, and has, in fact, almost quit on a few occasions. Sometimes I go days without talking to my boss, and generally don’t have many deep conversations with her very frequently. So when I do, it’s nice to get a different perspective on things. I’m nearly certain that if she were to ever leave, I would likely leave soon after, too. Mostly because I don’t think I would be able to fill her role and do a good job, and partly because I would be losing what I feel is the only person who understands the way I think and can decipher what I’m trying to say even when I don’t know how to say it. Also, it would be because no one else there shares my vision for how I want to shape the department and my role in it, nor does anyone else understand it. I’ve given up on trying to evangelize my career to an agency that is stuck in a process that’s simply fucked because money is drastically more important than the quality of work.

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